Ah...the admirable physician...

I've always had my heart on being a medical specialist, i.e. physician. During my medical student days, Alhamdulillah, I was the second highest during my medical posting ( according to my mentor). I loved the subject. Even my notes were colourful , in which I had combined my readings from Davidson and Kumar and clark. I also fell in love with the Davidson book. Not to mention also the lecturers were inspirational.

When I was a houseman, medical posting was my fourth posting, a.k.a 2nd year houseman already. Thus, most of my medical officers were quite lenient and was trustworthy enough towards me. Alhamdulillah I was entrusted with various kinds of procedures.

Since I was also jonah in medical, I had the opportunity to witness and attend many different kind of patients and situations - which are life threatening.

I admit that medical posting during houseman was one of the most hectic of them all, yet to me the most exciting of them all. Again Alhamdulillah, throughout my houseman days, I only had to actually take 4 days of medical leave , and that was forced by my senior medical officers. At the time, I was suspected of having H1N1. I believe I had contracted the disease from a patient ( who died afterwards) at the H1N1 ward.

Amid all these fascination, I am also beginning to consider the complete opposite,which is to become a full time housewife. After 3 months of taking full care of my little baby, I just can't bear to leave him to the hands of others. What more since my mother has been a full time housewife, thus, I my self could not fathom of a childhood world without a mother who's there 24/7 for me.

I know I do not have that option, because....I am bonded to the government for another 7 more years. Or else I would have to pay RM250,000.Hah..

A trip not to be forgotten

Alhamdulillah we have performed our umrah during my 7th month of pregnancy to Salahuddin..

Shy shy lah...

Since the last decade, I think I've noticed that there seemed to be a major shift in the youngsters' trends. I'm not implying that I'm already that old, though, but then again, having a child already, do somewhat indicate that I'm in the older category now. :>

A teenager now is far more exposed than I was about 15 years ago. ( Oh my, now I do feel old saying this)...I can't blame them though, with all the stuff being bombarded towards them, who wouldn't want to try out new stuff. Children see, children do, as they say.

They are more daring, , more adventurous and more willing to try out new stuff--> new gadgets and experimenting new situations., so to speak. With uncontrolled technology, comes its consequences.

But we didn't foresee before what would happen if we let it be. Lo and behold, now so many splashes of news regarding youth immoral behavior are bombarding us everyday. Fingers pointing ensue, but not much are being done.


Haven't we realized all the telltale clues before the downfall hits hard? If you just go to a newsstand, there are throngs of entertainment magazine that's just full of fashionistas telling you how to dress, of which most of them are revealing. Or how the 'artistic idols' love stories and gossips fill the mags as well as the newspapers. And is it just me, or even the national and prominent newspaper tend to also protray artists in certain poses of which I consider inappropriate? While at the same time, in the same paper, they quote ' to be asking' why are our youngsters' involved in immoral activities. Go figure...


I mean, who wouldn't want to dress in a similar way, if the outcome looks appealing?

In Islam, as evidenced in other aspects such as the medical world, prevention is the best medicine.
Now we are seeing so many advertisement from the Ministry of Health regarding prevention of dengue and No smoking campaigns to deter health problems, this also goes for immoral activities.

We have to start doing preventions. Amar Ma'ruf Nahi Mungkar. And it starts with us...
But the problem is that, we as parents are also at lost because we are in the same predicament.
I mean, who are we to educate our children, when we ourselves do not adhere to the same rule.

If we see a magazine or in the television showing what is forbidden by Allah do we care? Do we feel anything when we ourselves do not cover our aurah properly?


Lest we forget, one of the reason that Rasulullah was sent was to purify this immoral activities. Islam is a way of life, not just a religion. Islam is not just about praying, and celebrating eid or some solitary event. It is in everything that you do. It is about submission to Allah.Allah has set certain rules because He had created us, and He knows best. As a Muslim, we believe that,...but do we really believe it? What is our proof? Yet , whenever we fall into a musibah, we turn to Allah. We doa really hard, while before this we never really remember Him..How is it so?

" This is the Book (the Qur'an), whereof there is no doubt, a guidance to those who are Al-Muttaqin ( the pious believers of Islamic Monotheism who fear Allah much (abstain from all kinds of sins and evil deeds which He has forbidden) and love Allah much (perform all kinds of good deeds which He has ordained))" - Al Baqarah:2

From the time that we wake up until sleep, do we have the feeling that Allah is watching us? The angels are writing our deeds, be it evil or good.

Verily, our hearts are prone to wander off, and we are in need of a constant reminder. Nowadays, I feel that there are so much out there that just tugs our emotions and nafs.

"O Allah, You are my Lord, none has the right to be worshipped except You, You created me and I am Your servant and I abide to YOur covenant and promise as best as I can, I take refuge in You from the evil of which I have committed.I acknowledge Your favour upon me and I acknowledge my sin, so forgive me, for verily none can forgive sin except You."

"O Ever LIving, O Self-subsisting and supporter of all, by YOur mercy I seek assistance, rectify for me all of my affairs and do not leave me to myself, even for the blink of an eye"

(Remembrance said in the morning and evening, Hisnul Muslim, compiled and referenced by Sa'eed Ibn Wahf al-Qahtaani)

Oh baby ...

I only have less than a month before my maternity leave ends. It's been 2 months taking care of little salahuddin. Before this, I wasn't much of a baby person. I wasn't really that kind of a person who would stop whenever I see a cute baby and pinch his chubby cheeks. Or the kind would coo seeing an adorable baby. My sister is like that. I was more leveled, I think.

Lo and behold, as time grew , motherhood sort of smothers you with this babyish adoration. I guess this what you call 'mercy' towards children.

I wonder how a person can just be heartless towards children. They are innocent and frail. What more if the victimiser are the parents themselves. This is another excerpt from Tarbiyatul Aulad..


Nowadays, there seems to be numerous cases whereby the ones who should be protecting , are of the opposite. Instead, they forsaken their own children. Naudzubillah...

REcently, I came across a newspaper article that was dated in 2007, reported that it was found 30 plastic bags full of fetuses near a private clinic in a city in India. It was estimated over 20 years, about 10 million of female child being aborted/killed. Yet, they could not really ascertain as it was not allowed to do further research in determining the gender.

It just goes to show that the jahiliyyah tradition that was upheld during the Rasulullah's time, apparently still viable until to this modern day.


It's just scary nowadays, to raise a child in this time. There's just too many bad influences that you can't control. I can't imagine how would it be like in 10 years to come. InsyaAllah, pray that it will be better.

handmade cards

mommy hood versus housemanhood

my little salahuddin




Being a mommy...is just stellar..Confusing at times.And of course, tiring. At wee morning when your child is needed to be changed or in need of milk, and your eyes just insist on closing, you just know that the child comes first. Regardless what your state is. I've had my share of oncalls during my hospital years, but being with a baby, it's non-stop oncalls. Twice this week, my little Salahuddin wont sleep until about subuh. I have no idea why, especially when so many people tell you that their little ones just sleep most of the time. Is it just my baby , or did I do something wrong in taking care of him? I admit, I sometimes feel sort of mad at the baby for not falling asleep after relentless effort to sleep him. But after he stares at you innocently, you just melt away.

Being a mom can also be scary at times. When Salahuddin was less than a month old, he had many incidents of 'colics' of which he started crying when the bouts came. Alhamdulillah, I have my senior consultant, which it Tok Mek, who would suggest for 'demah' or 'tungku' baby to alleviate the symptoms. There were also advices for gripe water and 'yu yee' oil, which I found to be helpful. Even if we are doctors ourselves, it just felt useless at time like that. He just turned 2 month yesterday, even though it felt way longer than that.

Motherhood is a very important part of one's life. Much more so than our career, if you say so. For example, if you treat a patient, you see that patient in that instance of time, for that particular problem. Yet, if you are a mother, you are seeing that same patient until either you die first, or vice versa. You are the caretaker and sole reference for the child, not just for his health and well being, but also in terms of his emotional, intelligence and social aspect.

If we ask ourselves, how much are we prepared for motherhood?I don't mean in terms of the baby clothes, bottles, diapers and such, but in terms of our spiritual, mental and knowledge.

Before we are eligible holding a job, we have to complete some sort of competency, i.e degree,diploma and what nots. But what about becoming a mother? Do we have some sort of a guide or knowledge as to become a mother? I mean, a competent mother.

Verily, Islam has set guidelines in bringing up a child. There's this very good book, entitled Tarbiyatul Aulad, to be recommended. The author is Abdullah Nasih ULwan. For example, with regards to naming our child, there is a chapter on it, which you can read an excerpt of it below:


That's just on aspect from so many that we have to be aware of.

It's not wrong to go online or pick up from the magazine concerning the gadgets for babies because it's also a necessity , but not to forget also the important aspect of ibadah with our little ones.



Wallahu'alam...

I am a donor!!

Since being in the National Blood Bank, I am pretty much a dracula to say the least. Our main concern at the center is to ensure that there is enough blood for the hospital at the Klang valley - be it public or private sector. There is a very high demand for blood products from the hospitals. If one is oncall at the blood bank, you would know and be surprised that the usage is high indeed. With all the operations itself in need of back up blood products, then you can imagine how much we need in a day...
Thus, come in the role of the donors...which are most of us,mind you. Yet, there is stringent criteria nevertheless to become blood donors. It must be understood that, it is a privilege to become a donor, because we have to make sure that the blood products are in fact safe to be used for the patient. PATIENTS ARE THE UTMOST IMPORTANT FACTOR TO CONSIDER. REgardless how much a person is enthralled to become a donor, but if you are not eligible, it is because we put the patient in the consideration. Perhaps, you are at risk to transfer something detrimental to the patient.

For those who are eligible, do consider to become a regular blood donor as this is a very wonderful way to help others. Within a year, you can donate every 3 months. For apheresis donor, every 2 weeks at least. For red blood donor, you can save three lives as the blood are further more divided into 3 components - plasma, packed red cells and platelets. While the apheresis donor, platelets and plasma which are in need especially for cancer patients and paediatrics patients.

Think how much you can benefit others...

donate blood and save a life....insyaAllah

what is your priority in life?

As I ponder about my increasing age, a tug of emotions run through me. A day older simply means a day nearer to the day that we will meet our Maker. With increasing age, comes more responsibility. If then, we were only mere child with no such care in the world. Joy and excitement comes from our interaction with our families and the environment. Everything fascinates us. As we become more mature and enter the teenage years, the world seems so different. No longer our parents become the sole reference, now the eyes of our friends becomes all important. Then biological evolution takes over with our hormones burgeoning into action. The term LOVE causes a nuisance into our life as we try to grapple with such strong emotion.

This era of our life determines a lot how our future is shaped. Some survives it successfully, while some fall hopelessly.

The adult world itself brings an eormous change into one's life. Beginning of a new family and holding a job further distracts oneself from our real objectives. A strong anchor is needed to hold oneself glued to the right path.

If we do not reflect ourself and our life, we can easily be diverted by the powerful force of attraction to the life of dunia.

ECO mama

it has been one of my aims to be an eco friendly person.now, with a new role to play as a mother, the intention has been stronger. with an addition of a baby, the realization that we are hurting the environment through our everyday dealings with an infant has increased. Imagine that per day, a baby needs to be chaged is about a minimum of 3-4 times per day. so, per month, about 120 diapers are needed for only 1 baby.that is a equivalent to what if you multiply that to the whole of malaysian babies? What more is that, especially malays, have about 3-4 babies per person. That is only considering the diapers.How about the wipes or tissues invovled? Yet, its not fair to single out that regarding babies, us adults are also to blame. Countless of products we encounter everyday end up in the trash.

my little saladin

my very own salahuddin al-ayubi had arrived on the 23rd ramadhan..in the wee hours of 0308AM.

After hours of enduring pain , alhamdulillah he was born not long after starting to push, without any assisted delivery. The pain had subdued as soon as he was out. Lo and behold, there was this beautiful baby boy in front of me. There was this magical feeling, to hold your own flesh and blood.

It was23rd of ramadhan...and how I had hoped it to be lailatul qadr.

As soon as I had been admitted to the hospital, my husband was there throughout the whole ordeal. He was reading the Quran until the time of delivery, which had greatly calmed me.

InsyaAllah, he will be another salahuddin al-ayubi in the making....

38 weeks of gestation!!

This is what a baby would look like inside the mother's womb at 38 weeks of gestation...such as that I am right now.

The due date is on the 40th week of pregnancy...which for me falls 1 week prior to eidulfitri...if Allah izin that I really do deliver on the date itself, then i could proceed with the akikah 1 week after birth, (which is the sunnah thing to do) on eidulfitri, which is very much memorable.

The issues with my current pregnancy is that regarding fasting during my 3rd trimester. In general, there is leniency with regards to pregnant women fasting , especially so if in the 1st and 3rd trimester.

So far, I've fasted for the past one week. but today, i was so dehydrated, that I actually was not able to continue with my fast.

The thing is, I've made a mistake of not drinking enough water throughout the fasting season. As a tip for the pregnant mothers who are healthy enough to fast, please do keep yourself hydrated. Make sure that after breaking fast until the sahur, mind yourself to drink and drink.

From numerous articles, it has mentioned that at least 2 liters of fluids per day for those who chooose to fast.

Being pregnant, especially in the last weeks of pregnancy during the ramadhan month has its challenges. what more if before this you were the kind who tried to do as much as possible during the holy month. Nowadays,even getting up from bed is a hard task.

Thank goodness i've chosen to actually take 2 week earlier leave, which unfortunately has to be taken from my 3 month maternity leave.

InsyaAllah, there will be a lot more berkah being pregnant and hopefully deliver during this holy month....

After a long absence....

IT has been AGES since i last updated this blog...

Tons and tons has happened since the last time i wrote anything...

I guess I just got too caught up in the change of life...

in about 1 week's time, we'll be celebrating ramadhan...insyaAllah this time around,i'll be celebrating the holy month with a newly added beloved into our family.

Last year was the first time I celebrated ramadhan as a wife...and with a husband..

This year, insyaAllah, i will be a mother...

Sometimes, i just can't believe that i'm actually going to be a mother...

I still can't fathom that realization.

Even if most of my close friends have started their families, it just hasn't dawned on me that I would follow suit...hehe...

Last week I had a 3D scan of my little baby....my husband and I were ecstatic as we could visualize his face clearly....his cute little nose and all...his eyes all shut.

Currently i'm already 36+weeks ...and in just about 3 weeks, it will be the due date....if i dont deliver earlier that is....

BLOOdy DAy

Day 2 at the National Blood BAnk

What I can say is that it's definitely different from the previous 2 settings that I have worked with.

The hospital is a crazy-havoc place where you run around all over and always having work to do. Especially so when you are a houseman. With lethal consequences and high mortality rate.

Then I had a short stint at a research center. Well, it is a somewhat less hectic place with routine working hours and not so crazy shift. You deal with statistics and lots of writing.

Then comes the BLOOd BANK. Where your core business is...well...simply to get blood and testing of blood.

I'm still in the orientation process...so can't really comment much. Yet, so far, it's quite interesting. And you get to see hemophiliac patients...

The routine work consist of going out in the mobile clinics - blood drive , where you encounter healthy 'donors' to get more blood stock.

Then you have the 'slides' show...hehe...This means that you need to read the full blood picture slides.

You also get to see hemophiliac patients...which is quite a rare occasion if you go elsewhere.

You have oncalls, in which you are in charge of the whole of blood bank for that day. You will receive calls from hospitals , especially that from the Klang Valley regardign blood products.

Dont underestimate Blood Donation campaign...it's really an important business...

Imagine that these blood products are potentially lifesavers...a thin line between life and death...

especially in the cases of accidents or any bleeding that by replacement of blood, these lives can be saved ( of course, by Allah's Will)...

IN Malaysia, where cases of accidents are indeed high, these are inevitable life savers....

To all healthy people out there...please donate blood...you can save a life...

As a Muslim, we are very encouraged to help other people...why not so by donating blood...

The Decline of a Civilization?

The Millenia....

When it was the Y2K countdown, everybody was prophecizing so many outcomes toward our world...the Y2K bug...the so called apocalypse and so forth...

And now a decade has passed since the Y2K event....

Those who were born in the 90's...now becoming in their early 20's...the age of the NOT SO INNOCENCE...

the Gen-Y, so to speak...

I am ending my 20's soon...THis month I have turned 27...an age that I deem to be quite an aged individual...as of now,..i am a daughter,an elder sister to another 6 more younger siblings,a wife and a doctor...and waiting anxiously whether i can be a mother....

But as Allah has planned it so that I would able to open my eyes...WIDE OPEN...or in other words.. a shout out for me..that life is not as it used to be....

These few weeks , i have had to take care of the household...with my mother and father going away...the 2 younger siblings beneath me, need no taking care of from me...

But the other 4...one is 22, 17,13 and 10 respectively...

EAch with their own individual needs and different characters....OH MY....and I do mean dIFFERENT....

I realize a lot since this few weeks..i tried to juggle as a working person, a sister and a wife...

Initially I tried to make everything picture perfect...with ironing my husband's clothes, preparing breakfast and dinner for them all...

It took a different twist when suddenly I had been ordered by the minstry to be sent to the blood bank.. It was quite a jolt as I had thought of trying out for my entrance exam...

LO and behold..gone werer the days I actually tried to cook and everything..the Study was priority... I had a fixed idea that this one month I would do nothing but study..study and study...

HOwever being someone who is not accustomed to just studying.. I found it quite hard...

wait...I think it's getting out of the topic...

What I meant to write was that during this few weeks, I had the opportunity of being the caretaker of my siblings.. and handle all their problems...

Being in charge of them meant dealing with them in a lot of aspects of their life...

It made me realize that we have led differnt lives...even though we were raised in the same household..but the time we led were different,...even if it has only been a decade apart....

Their knowledge, their hobbies,pasttimes and all were altogether different form mine..

i remember I had my first handphone when I was in the university...so that I could contact my parents easily....

NOw my brother at the age of 15 already has his own handphone....

Chatting, messaging, facebook,my space and what nots... Yes I do know it also applies to that of my age....but albeit, i'm not that quirky about social networking....

Yet, the very idea of getting connected to a lot of people, those who you know and not..has created a phenomenon that is beyond our control....

and at a PRICE...a heavy price, that is....

for all its positive effect on our cvilization,...it has created a monster without us realizing it..

I should know...because it has also affected my family so much...

I can see the difference within my 3 younger siblings who are so hooked on the net ...they tend to pay attention to the computer.. and become somewhat lacking in terms of REAL SOCIAZLING, whihc in the real world...

With all these affecting our young generation, who can prophesize what would happen next...

na'uzubillah...May Allah Help Us ALL....

Who was the first one to develop stethoscope? Rene Theophile Hyacinthe Laennec

HE was a french physician who invested the stethoscope and perfected the art of auditory examination of the chest cavity

The stethoscope is one of the most vital instrument that doctors must have...

The use of stethoscope is that it functions as an amplifier...it helps in our diagnosis of a disease when we auscultate patient ...especially that of respiratory and cardiovascular problems....

teringat zaman-zaman houseman dulu

The days as a houseman..............

tepat 4 bulan habis houseman...pada umur 27 tahun

Grad umur 25...

time jadi houseman..terasa macam laaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaa nye masa nak berlalu..dan sekarang..kadang-kadang rindu pulak time2 tu..

rindu pada suasana hospital..degupan jantung yang tak menentu...

tidur yang x dpt tidur sgt..

cuti yang x cuti sangat..

hectic..havoc..jonah..semua ada....

bye bye kitty

4 days ago, we were suprised with one adorable kitten who appeared in front of our doorstep. Apparently, the mother had just given birth probably near the doorstep and left one of the kitten there. The whole day it sat there alone and unattended. By the time I noticed it , the time was already evening. There were blood stain all over the place. In fact, the umbilical cord was still attached to the abdomen.

Being someone who is actually scared of cats..imagine my surprise..

Of course i cannot simply let it outside like that. i waited and waited and waited...for the mother to come. she never came..

Lest, i took it inside and we named it 'kitty'..i wasn't sure whether it was a male or female..being ignorant as i am towards cat, i fed it cow's milk wiht a spoon. it seemed not to like it.

Lo and behold, i went to the internet for some info on newborn kitty..it stated that the best is for the mother ot take care of it. or get a foster mother cat..

wherer can i get that????

then if not, feed it with milk replacement... DO NOt GIVE COW's MILK..

AArrghh!! too late!!!

I went ot the pet shop that evening after work and got some low downs on how to take care of newborn kitten., The shopowner gave some tips and such..

I actually bought a bottle to feed it with!!

For the first itme in my life, i actually fed a kitten wiht a bottle.

At first it seemed to be getting better. the fur was getting more beautiful..

i tried to feed it as the advice said, tried to feed it every 2 hours..

and i was ecstatit when it actually pooped..hehe

OR SO I THOUGHT...

D4 of life...

I was shocked ot hear from my brother that after subuh prayers he had tried to wake up kitty and it never woke up..

For verily it;s life was taken by Allah...

here we go bloody bank!!

from a clinician to a researcher..to blood sucking vampire

what a road less traveled!! Phew...

Officially I was granted by the kementerian kesihatan to be sent to PDN now for my birthday..

too much has happened in so short of time that in the end cause me to have such a headache!!

Initially I had thought of becoming a clinician in the medical department, but now a part of me likes the thought of research/public health..but then again..i have to be sent to pusat darah negara...

Freedom from the entaglement of being a houseman!!

Date of freedom : 9th July 2010

The current institute....

statistics...statistics...statistics...

so different from the good old days at the hospital..

the institute director had mentioned that now we have to think as a researcher..no more thinking as a doctor,n utritionist , nurses and such...

it takes time to dissociate ourself from what we have been trained to do..

especially if we have been trained gruelly so..